One day, Chicken Little was out for his walk when an acorn fell from a tree and hit him on the head. Chicken Little was a very silly chicken, so he immediately thought the worst.
"The sky is falling!" he screamed. "I have to go tell someone!"
So Chicken Little ran and ran until he came upon Foxy Loxy.
"The sky is falling!" Chicken Little said. "I have to go tell someone!"
"What's a socialist?" Chicken Little asked.
"How about if I pay you a lot of money?" Foxy Loxy said.
So Chicken Little called Henny Penny and Goosey Lucy, and they all started going around on TV and radio and the Internet, insisting that, not only was the sky falling, but that it was all the fault of the President and the socialists.
One day, Chicken Little went to visit Foxy Loxy.
"Some people are beginning to say that the sky isn't falling after all," he complained."Looks like someone's drunk the Kool-Aid." Foxy Loxy laughed.
"What?" Chicken Little said.
"Some people are saying I was just hit on the head by an acorn."
"That's part of the liberal media conspiracy," Foxy Loxy said. "You can't believe anything they say.""But if the sky is falling," Chicken Little asked. "Why aren't we all dead?"
"Chicken Little," Foxy Loxy said, "Do you like getting your paycheck?""Sure," Chicken Little answered.
"Do you really think there's any money in telling people the sky is NOT falling?""I guess you're right," Chicken Little said. "But aren't there other things we can scare people with?"
Foxy Loxy looked suspicious. "Like what?""Like I heard that there are people who are making big messes and poisoning the water and the air. And some other big companies are cheating people of their money."
"Chicken Little," Foxy Loxy said patiently, "Those people are big advertisers on my TV network. If you make people afraid of them, they might demand that the government do something about it. If the government does that, they'll make less money. If they make less
"Exactly. And only a socialist would want something like that to happen. You're not a socialist, are you?"
"Very good," Foxy Loxy said. "So what do we tell the people?"
"That's my boy," said Foxy Loxy. "Now get out there and spread that fear."So they all got back to work telling everyone that the socialists and the president were all part of a big conspiracy that was making the sky fall. Anyone who tried to say different was told they were Kool-Aid drinking socialists. And they all got rich and lived happily ever after.
Well, Chicken Little and his friends did, at least. Everyone who listened to them spent all their time being scared and angry and mistrustful, afraid that the sky was falling.
But, of course, it never did.