Sunday, October 25, 2015

Yay! A New 'Star Wars' Trailer

So everyone’s watching (as of this writing) to see if Joe Biden’s in, out, or still dithering. The Donald and JEB! are exchanging nasty remarks because Trump pointed out, quite correctly, that JEB!’s bro was president on 9/11, something that was once considered treason when a Democrat dared to say it (which few did). It’s all very wearisome.
So of course, what I want to talk about is: YAY YAY YAY, THERE’S A NEW “STAR WARS” TRAILER OUT!
I can’t help it. I’m a huge “Star Wars” geek, and have been ever since the day back in 1977 when I sat with my best buds in the Town and Country Cinema in Aberdeen and watched that enormous white Star Destroyer slide ominously into view, seemingly from overhead and behind us, blasting away at the plucky little Rebel ship.
Even the tremendous disappointments that were the last three movies (the “prequels”) haven’t diminished my affection for what I’ll always think of as the real “Star Wars”: the tale of Luke and Leia, Han and Chewbacca, Obi-Wan and that bad, bad Darth Vader.
Sure, they were hokey. Sure, some of the dialogue was laughable. But those movies drew me in to a fascinating, complex universe full of heroes and villains and great stories, and they haven’t let me go yet.
All that said, after the aforementioned prequels (about which the less said the better), it’s hard for a fan not to feel some amount of trepidation over the idea of a new trilogy. Especially since they’re being directed by J.J. Abrams, whose “Star Trek” reboots were so ludicrous and full of logic holes that I can only get through them by regarding them as comedies.
So, like hundreds of thousands of others, I went to one of the numerous sites running the new trailer for “Star Wars Episode VII-The Force Awakens”, which releases December 18th . I crossed my fingers, took a deep breath, then played the trailer. Actually, I played it several times. Not too many. Twenty, thirty tops.
So far, I have to say, I’m encouraged. It looks like the Millennium Falcon’s back, along with Harrison Ford as the wisecracking, reluctant hero Han Solo. So is his friend, the giant hairy Wookiee Chewbacca.
I’m pleased to say that after the somewhat ridiculous baddies of the prequels (not even the great Christopher Lee could make a character named Count Dooku less than ridiculous), this villain looks truly villainous, in the Vader mold.
In fact, he seems to have a bit of a thing for ol’ Wheezy, since the trailer shows him looking down at a smashed and battered Vader mask and vowing “I will finish what you started.” It looks like the improvements in visual effects are put to good use in what appear to be epic TIE-fighter vs. X-wing battles.
Obviously, a mere rehash of the old movies wouldn’t be satisfying, so the trailer gives us a glimpse of some new characters: a plucky young woman with a staff on her back and a cute little rolling droid that looks like a soccer ball with a soup bowl on top; a tormented-looking black dude who appears to be a former stormtrooper-turned-Jedi; and a mysterious X-wing pilot played by Guatemalan actor Oscar Isaac.
Of course, no “Star Wars” movie release would be complete without some ridiculous controversy. Remember the fuss that erupted back in 1999 over whether the character Jar Jar Binks was a racist caricature, instead of just incredibly annoying? Well, this time, it seems to be white people complaining.
The casting of a woman, a black Englishman, and a Latino in the lead roles led to an eruption on the Internet using the hashtag “#BoycottStarWarsVII” and claiming the movie “is anti-white propaganda promoting #whitegenocide.”
Seriously. “White genocide.” At first I thought it had to be a joke, and there’s some evidence that that’s how it started out. But then it got picked up by actual racists decrying the “race mixing” in the film and referring to director Abrams as “Jew Jew Abrams.” #SMH, as the kids say on the Interwebs (it means “Shaking My Head”).
No matter. I’m not going to let a bunch of racist trolls ruin my enjoyment of Star Wars. There’s only one person who can do that, and his name is George Lucas. When the time comes, I’ll be there in the theater with my heart full of hope and my bag full of popcorn, ready to feel that sense of wonder and to be swept again into a galaxy far far away.

Don’t mess this one up, Mr. Abrams.
HATERS ARE GONNA HATE: The comments in today's Pilot show that, no matter how lighthearted or innocuous the topic, so-called "conservatives" are going to be dicks about it. Like this one from Mark/Francis: 
"Under the guise of a satirical article and sharing with all as you reminisce those days of your childhood, eating popcorn and stuffing yourself with concession stand goodies, once again you have cleverly stirred the pot in an attempt to create racially motivated comments, it seems to be the subject you get most enjoy and one that gives the most return to feed that ego. Try using a bigger spoon."

Get that? I'm not really a fan, I'm just "cleverly" disguising my real intent: to get "racially motivated" comments to feed my ego...comments which Mark/Francis can't keep himself from making. 
What must it be like to live inside a mind so profoundly fucked up?